can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
