she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
