Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
