bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
nutella sex= disaster
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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