we made out on top of his cat.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
