Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
