Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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