No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Randomize
