and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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