brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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