i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
