btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
