What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
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