their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
