so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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