What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
