You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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