I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
