I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
