you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
