we have officially lost it.
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Having a random hookup so left but love u
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
