I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
