walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
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