I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
