its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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