marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
