I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I pour the whiskey from now on
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize