I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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