can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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