how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
