i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
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