This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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