I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
