is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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