It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
