I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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