Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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