you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
