forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Randomize
