yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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