that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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