they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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