Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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