Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
