Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
