I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
