Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
