I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
