if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
