She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just had sex on a roof
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
